Relationship

Is it better to ask a girl out in person or by text?

Posted by John Anumba

Asking a girl out in person or through text message is totally acceptable depending on the girl, what she wants, and how you go about it.  One is not better than the other because you can either get rejected or accepted, not minding the one you choose.

It is best to learn more about the girl so as to know the best approach because a text message might be much easier if you don’t know how to express yourself with words due to butterflies in your tummy anytime she passes by.

However, there are some girls that prefer you tell them in person because a text message may seem weird.

There are magical words you can use in a text message and you will sweep her off her feet and get her going with you on as many dates as possible.

A few tricks on asking a girl out through text message

Before I help you out with some tips on asking a girl out through text, you should know that girls that love confidence in a guy might not appreciate you asking her out through text messages.

That said, I understand what it means to have butterflies because you are short of words and don’t know how to go about expressing your feelings to the girl.

It still doesn’t mean you’re not a confident guy, it’s just that you need some time to get the hang of it before knowing what to do.

For a casanova with lots of experience with girls, having the perfect line that can make a girl fall in love with them is no problem.

But if you truly care about someone, you may need some work and practice of lines to use before you are able to come up with something nice to say to her.

Rather than waiting till the perfect time that might never come, it is understandable to send her a text.

How you can use this text is what I’m going to help you with now.

I wrote a detailed post on how to ask a girl out through text message without being awkward about it.  You can read the full post here.

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 I will just give you a summary in this section if you want a crash course on the system.

Finding a common ground that connects you both

Finding a common ground that connects you and your crush
Credit: pixabay

Whether she is your crush or a girl you’ve known for a while, I’m sure you had some form of contact with her before sending a text message so that you don’t come out as being a stalker.

She should have your contact on her phone so as to recognize who is sending her a text message.

The ability to get through to her with your text message is by finding a common ground between you both.

You have to find something she enjoys doing and offer to do it with her.  It gets easier if you enjoy similar activities as she does.

In my post, I give an example of texting her from her favorite bar or restaurant asking if she wants something even though you know she’s busy so you can get it for her.

If she is less busy and loves that restaurant or bar a lot, she might offer to meet you up there.  

Who would turn down a nice meal or a few drinks at her favorite place with a guy she thinks is nice.

 You can see that from this technique, you asked her out in a way that seems right without her feeling awkward about your advances.

If she loves a particular movie or sequel that is about to be released in the cinemas,  getting your hands on the tickets for both of you would surely get her to appreciate a text message asking if she would like to go to the cinema on the premiere date.

The same technique works if her favorite band or artist in town. 

 I am sure your offer in a text message won’t be bad if you are asking her to go on the show with you.

If she’s someone you’ve known for a while and you know an activity she enjoys a lot,  if it involves some form of creativity,  you can ask for assistance or a tutorial from her on how to go about it on your own.

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 I am sure she would love to teach a friend and spend some quality time with you too. 

A text message requesting assistance from her will seem normal and not come out as being awkward.

There is no specific text messaging technique that works best. 

But you have a higher chance of getting a positive response if you are able to find something you both enjoy doing and use it as an excuse in a text message in asking her out.

What of asking a girl out in person

What of asking a girl out in person
Credit: pixabay

Like I said earlier, some girls find it attractive when a guy is confident enough to walk up to them and say what they truly want for themselves.  

I am sure she will appreciate the fact that’s why you’re taking the bold step to express your feelings and ask her out in a nice way.

This doesn’t mean a text message wouldn’t work on her – it depends on how you go about it.

Girls like this can also sense your confidence in your text messages. So it all depends on how you pass the message.

Getting to know more about the girl and what your relationship was like before you ask her out will determine the best route to going about it.

If you have been texting each other for a while over other matters and she has gotten used to you reaching out to her through texts, it doesn’t matter if you go in person or not, a text message with one of the techniques illustrated above will work just fine.

For a girl you are just getting to know, and have had few contacts with, a text message might not be that effective. If you are in a hurry about it, you should talk to her more often and let her know you would love to have a few drinks with her.

I wrote another detailed post on how to go about it in this post.

While you are warming up to her, trying not to go too deep into friendzone level or you might get stuck there. 

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At that point, asking her out either through text or in person might come off as being weird and that is not what you want.

It is best you let her know what you want early on so she is aware.

Whether we appreciate this fact or not, ladies appreciate honesty and you should not be afraid to speak your mind.

Let me know what your thoughts are

From this post, you can see that a text or asking in person works in getting a girl to go out on a date with you will depend on the girl, your level of acquaintance with her, and how you go about using any of the two techniques.

It gets easier if you are able to get to know her well.

Information is power and how much you know about this lady will empower you with ideas on how to get her attention and get her to date you.

Leave me questions and I would love to answer them.

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